Why Social Media Distraction Can Be A Good Thing
Photo by Annie Spratt via Unsplash
We’ve all heard that social media is bad for us – whether it’s doomscrolling, seeking external validation, creating unrealistic expectations for our lives, or simply too much screen time.
Research overwhelmingly supports this too: It highlights the negative effects of social media on mental health with direct links to increased anxiety and depression, decreased direct connection with family and friends, feelings of jealousy due to comparing oneself to others and neglecting self-care.
With all this backlash, it sure looks like social media is our enemy… but what if it also can be an unlikely hero? In many instances, social media has been a lifeline for people struggling with their mental health, especially for those suffering from isolation and loneliness.
Now that a few years have passed, we can see how the COVID-19 pandemic perfectly demonstrated this dichotomy. In some ways, during the height of the pandemic, we saw the very worst of social media. Misinformation led people to act at odds with their best interests. Culture wars were intensified by echo chambers, leading to suspicion and conflict.
However, social media was also a lifeline for millions of people. Stuck at home and isolated from loved ones, we used it as a major tool for connection. Not only did it help us connect with family and friends, but it also gave us a sense of community. It wasn’t just us going through this, it was society at large! Furthermore, it provided a vital distraction from the difficulties we were facing.
So, how can we harness the best of social media without falling into its many unhealthy traps?
How is Social Media a Distraction?
When we speak of social media being a distraction, we don’t mean replacing one overwhelming issue with another. It’s easy to make this mistake – you're anxious about work and so you turn to social media, only to end up doom scrolling. You may temporarily forget about work, but only because your mindspace is taken up by everything ‘wrong’ with the world!
Rather, the distraction of social media is in its ability to link us with things that give us momentary pleasure. This may come in the form of a relatable meme or a ‘good news’ story. It may be a kind message from a friend you haven’t seen in a while or joyous photos from their recent significant life event. It could even be some robust discussion among commenters about the sports team you support.
None of these things are going to magically solve all of your issues, but they feed you for a time while taking your mind off of any negative fixations. It is this kind of distraction that can be beneficial for mental health.
Benefits of Social Media Distraction
Social media has actually been beneficial for those struggling with mental illness in a number of ways. It has been shown to improve feelings of group belonging and connectedness. People are able to share their personal stories and learn about the multitude of ways others cope with the day-to-day challenges of living with a mental illness.
This sense of community is why we all joined social media to begin with, and one of the more obvious benefits of being on the platforms. But its ability to provide a healthy distraction is often overlooked. It’s why I sometimes encourage the use of social media and consider it a tool for healthy dissociation.
With my clients, I encourage the use of social media as an intentional distraction when their bodies are overwhelmed, their minds are racing, and they need a way to take a break from their emotions. It allows the body to get out of fight-or-flight and settle back into a more relaxed and regulated space. Once this happens, clients are better able to work through their emotions in a more deliberate, thoughtful, and engaged way.
An intentional distraction can be thought of as a form of healthy dissociation. There are two different dissociative states known as flow states and zone states. Flow states allow us to engage in personally meaningful experiences in a deeper way; whereas zone states allow us to engage in meaningless activities that can still be helpful when we need a break from daily stressors. If we can view social media as a healthy dissociation, we can certainly see the value it can potentially add to one’s life.
Finding the Balance in Social Media
Balance is necessary in everything we do in life. This is true even of the healthiest habits. An obsession with exercise can lead to neglect in other parts of life. Healthy eating can become orthorexia. Moderation Is not about staying away from so-called vices, but rather ensures you are able to tend to yourself holistically.
This is true, of course, with social media. Using it for distraction can be healthy, but overuse can lead you to neglect your overall mental health.
Balance and moderation are intimidating terms for many people as they assume these are traits you either have or you don’t. However, while it doesn’t come naturally to anyone, some simple skills can help you stay on top of your social media habits.
Here are some dos and don’ts to make sure social media plays a healthy role in your life:
Do: Be intentional about your social media use.
Ensure you are present and intentional with the content that you are consuming on social media. Use it to expand your social networks, to stay connected with current people in your life, to gain new knowledge or a skill, or simply use it to have a little fun. Just be sure you know exactly why you are getting on it, instead of passively scrolling for hours.
Intention is a tricky concept to master. Simply stating an alternative intention doesn’t magically make it true. It takes action. Curate your social media feed to match your desired intention. You can block any content that contradicts it. Over time, you will begin to see social media differently and start to access it with intentionality.
Don’t: Scroll passively.
Social media use tends to become a problem when we scroll indefinitely. This is what most people mean when they describe social media as a distraction. You can pass hours this way with very little memory of what you actually saw. When you use social media this way, you’re not truly distracted from your mental health issues no matter how curated your feed. You may also come across or engage with posts that make you feel worse as the algorithm feeds you different types of content to try to suck you in.
It’s inevitable that you will, on occasion, find yourself scrolling mindlessly. Being able to recognize that you are doing this is a huge step. There’s no need to rebuke yourself or regret it. Simply take a break when this happens.
Do: Prioritize time for real life experiences and people.
It can be easy to get carried away in the world of social media, daydreaming about vacations, liking family and friend’s posts, but nothing replaces real life experiences. Set dates to connect in person and plan events outside of your home. Use timers on your electronics to limit your use to less than an hour each day and practice putting your phone away when you are spending time with family and friends IRL.
Don’t: Forget that people online are real.
In some ways, social media has brought out the worst in humanity. Sitting behind a screen, it can be easy to forget that people online are more than the opinion they just posted or photo they shared. While you shouldn’t let online interactions replace your real life relationships, it’s crucial to remember that the people themselves are real. Subconsciously, this is something we are always aware of, which is why, after a negative online interaction, we further suppress our tendency to empathize.
Do: Find inspiration through social media.
Find inspiration in the things you are looking at on social media to reach your goals, or use it as a way to inspire resilience through challenging times. I like to make a regular habit of reassessing my feeds by unfollowing anyone that is causing me distress.
Studies have shown that we can create emotional contagion with the things that we share. Whenever you find something that brings you feelings of joy, makes you think of someone you care about, or you see something that moves you, consider sharing these things on social media. By doing so, not only do you experience the positive emotions, but the receiving party does as well – it’s a win-win!
Don’t: Compare yourself to others.
While looking for inspiration, it can become easy to compare yourself to those who are purporting to provide it. Comparing yourself to people on social media can lead to a downward spiral of self criticism and the “not good enough” syndrome we all know so well. We need to remember that what is presented on social media is only a snippet of people’s lives.
Do: Cultivate internal validation.
No matter how intentional you are about your social media use, it is easy to get caught up in the search for internal validation. Receiving likes and follows is addictive. The key is to take time to cultivate self-compassion.
First, it is important to remember you are worthy no matter what. There are no contingencies or conditions to your self-worth. No amount of likes, views, or follows will change your worthiness. To encourage self compassion, make it a regular practice to validate and make space for any negative thoughts and feelings that do show up, but also make it a regular practice to acknowledge your strengths and accomplishments instead of relying on external validation, especially from social media.
Sometimes it may also be necessary to take a break from actually posting on social media. If you find yourself checking constantly for likes or comments, your search for external validation has risen. It is a tough cycle to break out of if the triggers are still present.
Don’t: Avoid the negative thoughts.
While cultivating internal validation should be a priority, this is not the same as dismissing the craving for external validation. If negative thoughts arise while you’re using social media, that’s fine, as long as you pause and acknowledge they exist. Avoiding them does not make them go away but simply keeps them below the surface. By acknowledging them, you can let them go and reinforce your sense of internal validation.
Do: Take a social media break anytime – it will still be there.
Like anything else, too much of something can create problems in our lives. If you find that social media keeps you in a downward spiral of negative emotions or keeps you from fully engaging your life, this might be a sign that you need to delete those apps from your phone and take a break. For some, a break allows you to move away from the tunnel vision that social media can sometimes create. You can always decide to return to it later, or maybe you decide it just isn’t the right coping skill for you and that’s ok.
If you struggle to regulate the time you spend on social media, consider implementing a time limit. A time limit restricts your ability to access an app once you pass the boundary you have set.
Social Media Distraction Can Help
Social media is not always bad for mental health. There are many studies showing that it has benefits, especially for people who feel isolated. It is also possible to use social media to distract yourself when you are struggling with mental health. When you do use social media as a distraction, be intentional about how you use it and keep your goals in mind.